My human seems to think I spent my day hiding in the linen closet from the landscapers’ leaf blowers, but I was really pondering my career path and meditating to clear my thoughts. It was a day well spent, as I’m more confident than ever that I will be a star. (Assuming that I can get my human on the same page artistically.)
Much of my time today was spent contemplating the attributes of famous internet cats. Pokke, William of Mass Destruction, and Sockington are cute but talentless. Daisy is hot with that curly fur, but obviously stupid since she can’t figure out how to open the refrigerator (that just takes a little elbow grease). Keyboard Cat and other musical felines appeal to a limited demographic. Maru is certainly the most famous of the blogging cats, and he is charismatic and cute. Beyond that, I would have to attribute his success to slippery floors and an abundance of cardboard boxes. If I can get my human’s full cooperation, I know I will surpass all of their successes combined. I have the perfect combination of adorability, intelligence, business savvy, and quirkiness. I will become the next global feline star. And then I will work on a worldwide ban of leaf blowers.