my letter to maru

I’ve been working on my New Year’s resolution, which you will recall is a letter to Maru urging him to see a doctor about that troublesome mole on his nose.   I wish my trusty advisor Mojo Cat were here, but he’s on saCATical.  But here’s what I have so far.  Is it too harsh?

Dear Maru-san,
I am a business cat with some serious concerns about your welfare and interests.  I attempted to learn Japanese last week in order to communicate with you more easily, but found the studies were distracting me from my grooming.  So I’m hopeful that we speak the same dialect of feline.
Before getting to the point, I’d like to introduce myself.  I am Pedro the Cat, the American cow-spotted blogging cat and soon-to-be superstar that was recently named one of the Top 10 Cows of 2011.  You were actually the inspiration of my blog, which is entitled Maru Can Kiss My Furry…  I hope that you won’t be offended by the name of my blog, as it’s just a nod to my superiority.  The premise of my blog is that if an average, foldless and Scottish-liltless Scottish Fold cat can be a celebrity and published author, then a brilliant, business savvy, stunningly handsome, charismatic cat like myself can be an enormous (in fame, not girth) international superstar.  My blog chronicles my climb to superstarcatdom. 
I’ve studied your blog and career extensively, and I have some serious concerns about your treatment and welfare.  I feel as though a cat with your fame and income should have more.  More toys, more human servants, more sashimi.  And more artistic control – I’ve noticed lately that you seem to be annoyed by those cardboard boxes your human forces you to wear around the house. And less tooth brushing.
Additionally, and the main purpose of this letter, I’m very concerned about that mole on your nose.  I hope that you will urge your human to take you to have it carefully checked to rule out skin cancer (ganshu and kokushukushu from my week of Japanese language studies).  Cancers of the skin are the 2nd most common cancers in cats, so I hope that you will make sure that’s done immediately, as you’d be much less marketable without a nose.  That would also make hunting geckos much more difficult.  You do have geckos, don’t you?
Sincerely yours,
Pedro T. Cat

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21 comments on “my letter to maru

  1. Ah.
    I hope there is nothing to be worried about.
    I think the spot is just Maru’s coloring.
    Cats don’t really seem to have moles the way people do, just spots.
    But I did have a kitty, named Kitty, who had a black spot on her nose, and it even grew, but it was always just her markings.
    You could tell, partly, because it just looked like the rest of the kitty nose.
    Though we did ask vets about it.
    It was very silly.
    When she was a tiny kitten she had two spots, one on each side of her nose, and as she grew up the spots spread.
    Finally her entire nose leather was black, in the middle of a white nose and mouth.
    Extremely perfect and stylish.
    Sort of like our markings, but not so very individualist and unique!

    A cancer on a nose, though, looks different, not so smooth and normal.
    My poor lost Sugar, a sweet lady who found a home with me after her owner died, actually did have a cancer on her poor pink nose.
    It started as a tiny dot where there had been no pigment, and grew.
    But when it grew it looked sore, and looked a little pitted.
    These things tend to be sun-related, and Sugar had always been an outside kitty.
    I don’t think Maru spends a lot of time in the sun, so he doesn’t have so many risk factors.
    But it is always good to be careful about this sort of stuff, especially if you notice a change in a kitty’s nose or ears.
    You are a good kitty to think about these things.

  2. Ah Pedro….a very sensitively composed and honest letter to Maru. I don’t believe it’s too harsh AT ALL. Showing concern to a fellow feline is never wrong. Let’s hope Maru’s little “nasal anomaly” is a matter of his natural coloring rather than one of those fancy-shmancy Japanese terms you learned. I only have ONE question…….what’s the “T” stand for in your name? You’d think as your BFC I’d know that yet I am clueless. I do, however, think I’ll ask my Mom to give ME a middle name because I think your signature block is ever so sophisticated with that “T” in there……..

    Your Buddy in Virginia
    Sammy

  3. I’m glad to see you back on your way to superstarcatdom, Pedro. I know you’ve been working hard even if you haven’t been posting. I am sure that Maru and his person will appreciate your concern. Sprocket has a black splotch on his nose but I think it’s because his face-splotches dripped onto his nose before the ink dried.

    • Aloha, Littlemiao! My Japanese studies have been getting in the way of my pursuit of fame an fortune. I’m glad to get this letter out of the way and get back on track!

      I agree with your assessment of Sprocket’s adorable little nose, but don’t forget the sunscreen if you take him on walkabout! 😀

      • do they make tuna-flavored sunscreen? I think Sprocket would like that.

        But your nose is all black so you don’t have to worry about the sun even though you’re in Hawaii, right?

        • Ooh – tuna flavored sunscreen is a really good idea! If things don’t work out with the got milk? people, maybe we could start a sunscreen company…

          The bottom of my left nostril is white, so I’ll be sure to sunscreen that tiny bit if I ever become an outdoor kitty. Better safe than sorry!

  4. Very well written! I’m sure getting that resolution off your chest will enable you to concentrate even more on your own grooming and super-stardom efforts.

  5. Pedro, I’m happy to see that you are concerned for Maru! It would be good if more people/kitties would show concern! As you say, better safe than sorry! I love reading your blogs.

    • Aloha, Susan! I’m a Hawaiian cat, and we all know how important periodic mole checks are. Especially for white-nosed cats. I’m lucky to have a black nose, so I have less to be concerned about than Maru…

  6. now, now….do I detect some sour grapes about Maru’s incredible stardom?

    I must say, it was quite genius of you Pedro to name your blog this so that YOU come up in the Google Searches with Maru!!! Hmmmm…wonder what Maru thinks of THAT!!??? MOL!!!

    As for the “mole”…I agree that it is probably just his coloring…and if not……if Marilyn Monroe and Cindy Crawford could have enormous fame from having moles…then that is just one more plus that Maru can add to his already fame-filled life!

    Your pal in honest observation, Cody

    • No sour grapes here, and my blog began before I knew anything at all about Google searches. And I still don’t know much about all of that.

      The name of the blog was a nod to my obvious feline superiority over Maru. I am larger, stunningly beautiful, a superior hunter, ambitious, and I can type. Therefore, Maru Can Kiss My Furry… Maru’s human is quite a business person, and I have nothing but respect for her. At least I think she’s a her.

      I can only reiterate, I am a Hawaiian cat and we are all very aware of the dangers of skin cancer, especially in fair-nosed cats. Cindy Crawford and Marilyn Monroe are also fair-nosed, so I hope their moles were/are checked on a regular basis as well. I don’t recall what color your nose is, but I hope that you have any moles checked regularly and wear sunscreen when you go outside. Better to be safe than sorry! 🙂

  7. Nicely done. I’m impressed with your knowledge.

    Duke (thanks one again, Shez her blog is Totally Random Shez on wordpress at shezwrites, just in case you ever want to see a photo of me or my family.

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